What's Left
I feel like the last few years all I’ve been doing is climbing but not really going anywhere, you know? And while in the wilderness, it's easy to see the things I’m missing in my life or the things that I have lost. I notice what I lack and am quick to point out my weaknesses and flaws. My head has me questioning where God is in the middle of all this, but my heart knows He is right there and that I can come to Him just as I am. It’s a constant pull between what I know to be true and what the enemy wants me to hear and believe.
And the hard part, at least for me, is to push past the lies in order to seek the entire truth. To rest in His promises and love and see the blessings in the mundane and ordinary moments. To see the blessings in the storm and rely on my faith until His promises come to pass. I have my moments of clarity, the moments when I can see the beauty. But I also have moments of darkness, where the storms cloud my eyesight showing me the pain and heartache I’ve endured.
But I can’t stay in the darkness because I know that there is more inside of me. What’s left doesn’t become useless, but is powerful. Fueled by His grace and love, by redemption and compassion. What is left is fueled by the Holy Spirit living and breathing inside of me. And just because I am broken and have walked a hard journey, that doesn’t void what God wants to do through my life.