A Great Peace


The usual stress I feel at this point of the fertility drug process has been replaced by such a great peace.  My spirit and emotions are at ease tonight.  It's because I have finally found rest with my Savior.  I finally gave up trying to control the infertility situation.  Sometimes, it is so hard to let go and place it in God's hands.  But once you do, it's such an amazing feeling. The stress and anxiety just subside.  I was letting it consume me day in and day out.  That's not any way to live.  I know that I am going to have more children.  I just have to remember in God's timing, not mine.


I have been very open about this season of our lives.  Partly because I feel like if I blog about it, I release all the fear and pain and uncertainty that's on the inside.  But mostly, because I know that I am not alone with the pain and struggles due to infertility.  I know that someone out there understands my turmoil and that is a comforting thought.  I ask for as many prayers as possible as Adam and I walk down a different road this month.  This morning I had a procedure.  I'm not going to allow my mind to jump ahead and be consumed with the thoughts of if it will work or not.  I'm just going to keep praying and lifting up every fear and concern to Him.  To the only one who can fill me with peace.  And hopefully, after its all said and done, it'll make us a family of five OR six.  

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