Beauty for Ashes

What ever you run from (past, mistake, sin, person, memory), God will eventually take you back to that thing or place and you will have to deal with it before you can ever get well.  -Joyce Meyer There is so much truth in what she said.  How many times in your life have you ran?  Probably more times than you can count.  I know I have.  But why?  Was it fear?  Was it pride?  Was it just easier to run than to stay?  What ever the reason, just know that you can come back and face it with God.  God will give you the strength.  He will give you the grace.  He will help you through to the other side.   God has been bringing me back to things I ran from years ago.  He has shown me areas that I need healing in.  It is never easy; that's why I ran all those years back.  But you know what?  I have such a tremendous peace that goes along with  facing these things now.  Peace like I've never fel...

Having lived in Florida my entire life, the beach was a place my family spent a lot of time at. Some of my most treasured memories are of our extended family coming together every summer for a week of beach fun. It never grew old. I still love it to this day! The beach is a place of solitude for me. A place I can go and completely turn my mind off. There is just something so peaceful about watching and listening to the ocean. Wave after wave crashing on the shoreline. The boys playing together, laughing and being as loud as they want. The beach is my favorite spot to go and just talk to God. The hustle and bustle of life stops the moment my toes hit the sand, the moment I can hear the ocean and smell the salt. No matter where I am, God will meet me in that moment.   Psalm 139: 9-10 has been with me all week. It says, "If I rise on the wings of the dawn, if I settle on the far side of the sea, even there your hand will guide me, your right hand will hold me fast." No matt...

The sunset was so amazing last night over Lake Cannon, that it stopped me in my tracks.  We had just left my grandparent's lake house and when we got to the other side of their lake, we saw this.  Luckily, there were no cars on the road because that allowed me to stop and take some shots from the truck.  I couldn't pass up the opportunity to photograph this.  Even the boys were in awe of it.  Looking at the brightly colored sky, it made me think about God and his goodness.  Especially, new beginnings.  I know at times, our lives are difficult.  They are busy.  They can be very chaotic.  But there are those moments when we experience pure peace.  That was last night for me.  I believe that God gives us this beauty in the sky to remind us to find our peace.  To ease our trouble and worries at the end of the day.  To say, 'I know your day was hard, but remember, tomorrow will be a new day.'   I don't know what ...

Waiting.  Letting go.  Giving up control.  Being patient.  These things are so difficult.  I struggle with these things often.  More often than I'd like to admit.  At times, I wish I were a little stronger.  I wish I were a little more patient.  I wish I were able to freely give up control of every situation; especially, the situations where I want a certain outcome.  My struggle with the flesh is real at times in these areas.  That is when I am incredibly thankful for God's grace.  For His compassion.  For His love.  For His peace in the midst of a storm.  I'm thankful He loves me so much and will never give up on me.  Surely, He must be tired of me failing.  Of me making mistakes.  Of me not including Him in every decision.  Surely, He must be tired of me.  The truth is, He isn't.  Just like our earthly father teaches us and corrects us and loves us through, Our God does the same. ...

“Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting; but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised.” Proverbs 31:30 You know, some birthdays are harder than others.  There is just something about turning another year older that gets to you.  My thirty-fifth birthday is on Wednesday, and I have to admit, I am having a hard time with this one.  It seems like just yesterday, I was turning the big 3-0.  The older I get, the faster the years fly by.  I just need time to slow down just a bit.   This birthday, has got me thinking a lot about what true  beauty looks like and what the world says it is.  For so many years, I was led to believe the wrong things about it all.  For so long, I thought to be truly beautiful, I had to have this perfect body in order to even be considered normal or pretty.  Magazines, television, and the entertainment industry all label what they see as beautiful the wrong way.  To be beautiful, you don...

This morning as I was driving to an  appointment, there it was.  I made a right turn and it practically hit me in the face.  It was this gorgeous rainbow.  I don't know about you, but whenever I see a rainbow, I get excited.  I stand and look in awe of just the beauty.  It took me by surprise because it was a typical hot and sunny morning in Florida.  Not a storm in sight.  The sun was shining so brightly.  I probably wouldn't have noticed it had it not been for my polarized sunglasses because it was almost transparent to the naked eye.  I felt in that moment, God was speaking to me directly.  I felt as if He placed that rainbow in my path for my eyes only.  He knew what I had prayed for before leaving our home this morning.  He knew it would take something grand to get me to hear Him.  He was reminding me of His promises and what the rainbow stood for.  Such an amazing moment with God this morning. I have bee...

Yes, I have found my light.  It wasn't an easy thing to do at first, but I pushed through until I  succeeded.  Like you, I too, was once lost.  That is until God found me.  Or it was more like I finally found God.  I'm so thankful He didn't give up on me.  He was right beside me even when I was lost.  Some say life will throw you curve balls, but, as a believer, I know it is the enemy trying to derail us.  The enemy will do anything to keep you in the dark.  Once that darkness has a grip on you, it can feel as if you will never see the light of day again.  That is such a scary thing.  He will do anything to tear you down.  He can make you feel hopeless, like you are not good enough, like you will never get out of this pit.  But, I'm here to say, " You are not any of those things and you can and will get out of that darkness."    I truly believe that you can get out of the dark only once you allow the ...

I know we shouldn't dread anything, but I do.  Every other Monday that rolls around, I dread it.  It's because, every other Monday, I have to say goodbye to the boys for a week.  Some weeks are harder than others. Some weeks without them seem to go by quickly, others not so much.  This week, it's hard. I'm sitting here, by the lake, watching them fish and just be boys.  I'm watching them cast their lines out with such anticipation because of what they may catch.  I'm listening to them laugh and carry on. It's been a busy, fun-filled week for us on the water.  I'm not ready for them to leave just yet.  All I can think about is what I will miss this week when they are away. I don't want to say goodbye to them tonight.  I want them to stay.  This is the side of divorce that stinks.  This is the hard part.  My heart is heavy and hurting tonight, so I have to remind myself that they'll be back in no time.  I have a week of ...

Ever feel lost?  Like you have no clue where to go or what's next?  I know I do from time to time.  It's a tough season when you are standing at the fork in the road unsure if you should go left, right or straight ahead.  We always want to choose the correct way and walk the path with the least resistance, right? It doesn't always work that way though.  In those moments of indecision, why not stop and ask God for the answer?  He may show us the way rather quickly or He may take some time to show us the right way to take.  In the moments of waiting, the bible tells us to just be still.  Be still and listen for His still small voice.  Being still and waiting isn't always an easy thing to do.  We have become so accustomed to getting things in an instant that it makes us incredibly impatient when we have to wait.  God doesn't always work that way.  He shows us the things we need to know in His timing, not ours.  Sometime...

God, I'm reaching up, trying to get out of this valley but I can't seem to get a grip.  Lord, this walk through the valley is hard this time.  It's dark and scary.  I can barely see the sunlight shining through the trees.  Lord, please extend your hand.  Just enough for me to grab hold of.  Please help me climb out of this valley.  I'm not wanting to be at the top of the mountain, just high enough to clear the trees.  High enough to feel the warmth of the sun.  High enough to be able to breathe fresh air again.  I know I'm here for a reason, but haven't figured it out yet.  I'm praying and listening for your still small voice.  Lord, the days are getting long.  I'm growing tired and weak.  My faith is shaken.  Your voice seems to be fading too.  Please restore in me my peace.  Please restore my hope.  Please restore my strength. Son, I know this valley is tough, but you will get through ...

I felt led to write this tonight for someone.  I just want you to know that you have been on my heart for a few weeks now.  I hope this reaches you when you need it most.   I don't know what is going on and I don't need to.  I just want you to know that I can feel your struggle.  I can feel your pain and sorrow.  I can feel that you are in need, but are unsure of what to do.  You are afraid to ask for help.  You are afraid of what people are going to think about your situation.  You have no idea what you are going to do next.  It's not just you in this situation, but two little ones.  You are afraid that you are going to make the wrong decisions and that they will grow up to resent you.  You want to do everything right, but, you know the right thing to do will also be the hardest.   In this time, depend on God for the answers.  He really does love you.  He will guide your footsteps along this journey.  H...

I saw a post from Joel Osteen this morning that stayed with me.  He said, "The day you quit being excited about your future is the day you quit living.  You have seeds of greatness on the inside.  There's something more for you to accomplish." Then I applied it to my life right this moment.  Right now, I'm struggling to have a baby.  Today is the day I am supposed to take a pregnancy test, but I already know the results.  I don't want to take one because it will make the reality of the answer a little more devastating.  It hurts even more looking down at the negative result.  I know my body.  I know that I am not pregnant.  This round of fertility drugs did not take.  We have to start again.  I would be lying if I said I'm not upset.  Right now, I'm breaking.  I don't want Adam to see just how upset I am, but at any moment, the tears are going to pour from my eyes.  Even sitting here writing about this realit...

Growing up, I didn't really understand what it meant to have a sister.  I never realized the gift God gave me until we were adults with children of our own.  I wish there was a way to go back to when we were kids.  I would do things differently.  Not only do I have a sister, but I have a best friend for life.  I am so thankful for her. I had a few amazing people I could really depend on after my divorce.  But my sister was the one who made the biggest impact on my life.  I know that God had his hand in that from the very beginning.  I can't even begin to count the number of times she just sat there and listened to me sob.  Or the number of times she encouraged me to stay strong and that tomorrow was another day.  I can't count the number of times she prayed over me and the number of times she was just there. She will never fully understand how much she did during that time of my life or how much she means to me now.  She wi...

Ladies, We are ALL wonder women!  We are the daughters of the most High King.  We are fearfully and wonderfully made.  We are amazing. Society makes us look at beauty one way.  The wrong way.  For so many years, I allowed someone I loved and trusted tell me otherwise.  For so many years, I felt defeated and not valued.  For so many years, I felt ugly and incapable of being loved.  Don't ever let anyone allow you to feel that way.  We are all different.  We are all unique.  We all have different abilities and skills that were given to us by our God.  We all have so many beautiful traits.  Beautiful traits that should be celebrated, not put down. Ladies, you are ALL beautiful!  You are ALL strong and courageous! You are ALL perfect in His eyes.  You are ALL so very special.  Don't ever forget it.