A Great Future

Joyce Meyer said something today that really spoke to me.  She said, " you can get over your past if you believe there is nothing from your past that will prevent you from having a great future."  This couldn't be more true.  I know that I am guilty of allowing my past to influence my present.  Especially when it's a feeling or an emotion of what once was.  When I allow this to happen, I am only robbing myself of a great future.  I applied her statement to my life.  Just because God has redeemed me from my past doesn't mean I won't have trials that come up.  The problem is when I allow the feelings of the past to consume me now.  I don't know about you, but this isn't the way I want to live.  After my divorce, that chapter of my life was over.  It shouldn't still have any impact on the new chapter I am writing with Adam.  But sometimes, it does.  It does because I allow it without even realizing. 

Not that long ago, I shared in my blog, "The Struggle is Part of My Story" that I had a reaction when I was asked, "why don't you wear more dresses?"  It brought up so much pain and bad memories from my past.  A past where I endured a former spouse with a pornography addiction.  What I didn't say was that my husband asked me that question.  He wasn't saying it to degrade me. He just likes it when I wear them.  Because of my past and the way my former spouse treated me, I took his question the wrong way.  I shut down and allowed the feelings of the past to overtake me.  In that moment, I allowed the closed chapter to alter the new one.  In this instant, I never wore dresses.  All because of my past.  That wasn't fair to Adam.  He never did those things to me.  He wasn't guilty of comparing me to other women.  He wasn't the one who had a pornography addiction.  He has never once made me feel the way my former spouse had.  So, why was I allowing the closed chapter impact us today?  It's because I was hearing Adam's question but remembering the way my former spouse made me feel.  In that moment, my vision was blurred and I allowed the lines of the chapters to cross.  And that wasn't right.  

Because of all the years of mental and verbal abuse, anytime a trigger is stepped on, I immediately blend the two chapters without even realizing it.  That is until now.  God has slowly shown me when I allow my past to prevent me from living a great future.  He has opened my eyes.  I know there are probably more triggers that I'm going to have to deal with.  But with God's help, I will be able to recognize when it is happening.  I'll be able to stop it before it impacts my today.  

I'm so thankful that God hasn't given up on me.  I'm so thankful that God is patient with me.  I'm so thankful that He loves me enough to correct me when I am wrong.  Are there any feelings or memories that alter how you do things today? If so, break that chain.  Don't allow the past to impact your future.  After all, God has a great future in store for you too.

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