My Inspiration

Walking down this road of sharing my testimony was something four years in the making.  I knew one day I would have to choose to be courageous and just do it.  I would have to push all the fears of what people would think or what they will say or how they would look at me to the side.  I was always afraid of letting the world know just how I had suffered.  I was afraid of being transparent in order to be able to explain my story in a way that people could relate too.  In a real and frank way.  I was afraid because no one talks about pornography or infidelity, really.  It has come to a point where it is just accepted and that's not okay.  I'm not afraid of any of those things now.  I'm boldly and courageously standing up to be the voice someone needs to hear.  If that means I'll have a target on my back, so be it.  I know that there are women who are suffering out there.  Women who are afraid to have a voice.  Women who have no clue what to do.  

I love when women reach out to me thanking me for sharing my story.  I love to hear how it is helping them cope or heal.  It is what drives me to continue writing.  It is what drives me to be comfortable about being so open and honest with my personal struggles.  My hope is that it will in turn give them the courage to be bold and share their testimony too.  You just never know how many could be impacted by your story.  My heart aches at just the thought of someone going through all I had to endure.  All I want to do is bring some healing to them and let them know I understand their pain.  I want them to know that they are not alone.  Sometimes along the way, I realize an area in my own life that needs to be healed.  You see, I have pushed so many things away, that I don't know they are there unless something triggers it.  I'm thankful that triggers are still being stepped on today.  I'm thankful for God opening my eyes up to something that isn't healed within me.  It only gives me more opportunities to share how I will overcome and to share my faith.  It also gives me another opportunity to give God the glory for what He is doing in my life.  Someone reached out to me the other day and said this, "God allows only that which He can use."  My suffering had a purpose.  And sometimes, God uses our deepest pain as the launching pad for our greatest calling.  

My inspiration comes from Joyce Meyer.  If you haven't heard her testimony, you need to look it up.  She is as real as they come.  She uses her testimony to bring healing to millions all around the world. Imagine if she listened to everyone who told her she couldn't preach the word because she was a woman.  Imagine if she never shared her personal testimony with the world.  The millions of people she has helped and the millions of people she is helping today would have never known the power God has to restore and redeem them.  They would not have known how much God loves them.  Joyce Meyer talks openly about her past often during her teachings.  She paints a picture of what once was to be able to reach millions in an unique and personal way.  She is able to explain perfectly how to overcome what she has already faced.  She tells us her life experiences so we can then apply it to our lives to better ourselves.  She doesn't talk about her past because she is bitter or hasn't forgiven.  She isn't talking about her past to be hurtful or bad mouth her father.  And she doesn't bring up her past because she is a negative person.  It's the complete opposite.  She talks about her past because she wants the world to know of all the wonderful things God has done in her life (Psalm 105:1-5).  She wants to give God the glory He deserves.  Because she has been redeemed and healed, she is able to talk about her past struggles.  I am thankful for her and that she didn't listen to the negative people in her life.  I'm thankful she followed her calling God placed on her life.  God used her deepest pains to fulfill His calling on her life.  She found her passion because of her pain.

I'm sure somewhere down the line I'll catch some opposition because of my testimony and the subject matter.  And that's okay.  I'm going to continue to write as long as I feel called to do so.  My past is now my passion in life.  Not because I'm bitter or haven't forgiven.  I'm going to continue to use my real life experiences to help others just like Joyce Meyer does.  I'm going to continue to help as many women as I possibly can to overcome something they feel is impossible.  At this point, no fear, threats or any negativity will derail me.  My God is bigger than all of that.  If anything, it only fuels me to write more.  To share my faith and how just an ordinary girl like me overcame with God's help. Because He has done so many wonderful things in my life, I will not keep quiet about it. I'm giving God all the glory. 

There is power in Jesus Christ and I will do anything possible to reach the women who need to hear it.  God saved me.  God healed me.  God restored me.  And there are women out there who need to hear it is possible for them too.  The enemy will do anything to try and stop someone from sharing their faith and love for God.  But the enemy will not stop me.  

Psalm 105:1-5
Give praise to the Lord, proclaim his name; make known among the nations what he has done.  Sing to him, sing praise to him; tell of all his wonderful acts.  Glory in his holy name; let the hearts of those who seek the Lord rejoice.  Look to the Lord and his strength; seek his face always.  Remember the wonders he has done, his miracles, and the judgements he pronounced





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